How Two Pink Lines Changed My Life...

Finding out I was pregnant with Aisling was a very big shock. Aidan and I had just moved home after a year long working holiday in the UK. We had fallen in love with the place and were intending on coming home, getting married, saving lots of money and returning back to the UK possibly for a longer stretch of time. So as you can imagine finding out I was pregnant two days after we returned home was very scary and a big shock. We made it work, though it was a struggle to adjust back to regular life with a baby on the way especially because from about six weeks into my pregnancy I was hit with awful all day morning sickness which meant I was unable to work. It wasn't until I was over 30 weeks that I started feeling better.

I found out I was pregnant before I had even missed a period. I didn't take the pregnancy test for any reason I just had a funny urge when I found the pregnancy test while rummaging through old draws and I thought I would take the test to stop it playing on my mind and I could move on. Boy was I surprised when that first little pink line appeared and then the second. Aidan wasn't with me and I called him into our bedroom and shared the news. I expected him to freak out more than he did but he was relatively calm.

I always felt she was a girl. Everyone I knew had little boys so I wanted to be different and have a little girl. We found out at our 20 week scan and asked the ultrasound technician to write it on a piece of paper and put it in an envelope. With that envelope in our hand we didn't last long the suspense was too much. So off we went to a little cafe in town and ordered coffee and cake and opened the envelope. Even though it wasn't a massive gender reveal party it was such a special moment that I still hold dear. To tell our family I baked the worst cake in the history of the world and filled it with pink cream so when our families cut the cake it revealed we were having a girl. Everyone was thrilled and immediately began buying pink!

I felt her first kick on a very special day. It was my deceased brothers birthday and every year we go out for dinner with my family. This year Aidan was working and I was on my own laying on the lounge watching TV feeling a little sad waiting to be picked up to go to dinner when I started feeling little thumps. It felt like the baby was head butting me. I was expecting to feel butterflies like so many people say but I had an anterior placenta which masked a lot of the movements and kicks for me. Later on down the track Aisling used to get the hiccups a lot which used to make my stomach jump around.

Apart from the terrible morning sickness I didn't really have any complications until the end of my pregnancy when a routine midwives visit discovered my fundal height was measuring low. I was sent for an ultrasound which discovered my baby was smaller than she should have been. I think I was 32-33 weeks at the time and the best course of action was to have more regular check ups and another ultrasound in two weeks. I can't remember if I had two or three ultrasounds all up but my last ultrasound at 36 weeks revealed that my baby wasn't growing much at all any more and my fluid was decreasing.

I went through the public health system for my pregnancy and I started seeing midwives but changed to seeing the doctors for a little more through care as I became higher risk with the morning sickness and my babies growth slowing down however I was disappointed in the continuity of care I was given. I felt like they didn't take my morning sickness seriously, I still feel guilty maybe my throwing up numerous times a day was why my baby was so small? Anyway I seen a different DR every appointment and my last appointment wasn't any different. I remember being disappointed that it wasn't the same DR from the week before as I had really liked him but this DR after consulting my ultrasound results and seeing that my baby hadn't grown much  and my fluids were decreasing went out to talk with her supervisor about the best action to take as I was almost 37 weeks which is considered full term.

When she returned to the room she told me that the best action to take would be to induce me as my baby was full term and she would be safer out than in. She then checked my cervix and declared me as "Closed, so closed" which didn't sound promising at all and rang the birthing suite to book my induction for a few days time. In the meantime I had to come in everyday for a CTG which is where they monitor the babies heart rate for a certain period of time to make sure baby isn't in distress.

I had a student midwife throughout my pregnancy and I'm so so glad I found her as it was so lovely to have a friendly familar face come to my appointments with me. It was also good if I needed to clarify any information I was given but didn't feel entirely comfortable with the doctor.

Anyway to summarize my pregnancy it was mix of excitement and nervousness. Some of the highs were the ultrasounds, finding out the gender, feeling her kick for the first time and that special feeling of carrying the baby of the person you love the most in the world. I loved preparing her nursery and washing and folding all her tiny baby clothes although I had no idea just how small I would need to buy. The lows were definitely the morning sickness, the not being able to work and the complications in the end.

This is one of the only belly shots I have from my pregnancy. This was towards the end.